everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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