Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
