One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize