at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
How's work?
Spinning.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
