Taylor Swift is so right about you.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
