sorry about calling you the devil all night.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
