What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize