So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize