You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
