Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize