He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
