seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
