Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I need moral support for this bender
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Randomize
