You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
