Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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