Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
