Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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