You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
