i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
