sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
