she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
