Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Randomize
