I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Say something about gay babies.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
