eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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