People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
