oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
