So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
