I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
