We're like a lot better than the average bears
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
