So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize