he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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