I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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