there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
