Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
