We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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