a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
