I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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