no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
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