Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
