At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
