I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
