Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
