Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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