My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
