Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
