Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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