I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I will pee on everything he values.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
