It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
