Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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