): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
