Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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